ok last post was about ending the long hiatus, but allow me to share some of life updates between 2020 and 2023. 
*ni yang updated and santai punya tau*

hehee...

so last month I completed my viva voce session for masters program in Bioindustrial Technology in UMK and this semester supposed to be my last sem la (4th sem) and alhamdulillah everything went as well as it could for me... yeayyyyy GOT!! =) 
Although there were times yang I rasa I brain fog... I answered those questions in speech based on my research project and discipline (dengan cara kelam kelibut), I passed with minor correction! hehehe!).

Honestly, sebab banyak cerita yang jadi between the year 2020 and 2023, I want to summarize my life updates to a lot of people yang baca kat blog ni secara surface jer. 

so here goes!

1. career
I have been a graduate teaching assistant (GTA) as Physics and Biology instructor since August and I completed the 3 months contract before this December 2023, a month after I jadi graduate research assistant (GRA) to my supervisor, Dr Wee Seng Kew also known as Dr Wee, Dr Senq but I refer him - big boss Dr Q hahahah. 

Alhamdulillah GTA is doing well =) 
the reason I applied for teaching assistant sebab I want to gain some experiences in marking homework, lab report, demonstrating lab and tutorial classes. Since I've been assisting Dr Johari, Dr Irene & Dr Aina... I banyak handle SPM leavers from Asasi Sains Ascent UMK... 

2. studies
I took masters at the Faculty of Bioengineering and Technology in UMK to be exact on November 30th, 2021, a few months after I graduated my bachelor degree. Fuh!!! haritu ramai gak yang tanya... kenapa tak kerja dulu baru pursue masters degree??? *nanes sok sek* 

I wasn't keen to apply job in industry (dapat offer jugak for wastewater treatment in corrosion kat Puchong). In fact, I received an offer straight away to pursue masters degree kat UKM in chemistry/food technology but I lagi tahu selok belok lab work kat UMK, so I declined offer Prof Azwan of UKM (ada yang kenal ke? hehee...)

one more offer yang I susah nak decline is Dr Wee ada offer to continue my research project at PhD level. To be specific in Bioinformatics so I'll be playing around with some PCR, DNA extraction and gel electrophoresis stuffs. Sebenarnya, I suka dengan biomolecular stuffs sebabnya:
- I suka microbes
- I ada basic since I've been exposed to handle FYP students and class as well.
- Maybe this project will be bonded to Petronas (insyaAllah..)

basically, I have started a new chapter in my life. My priority now is my research and preparing for some publications. heee... publications tu memang tak boleh lari ya =) and applying grant.

3. research
kadang kadang terfikir macam mana boleh sangkut kat research as passion??
tapi... tak tau la. since sambung masters banyak pulak pintu rezeki terbukak dalam macam macam rupa! geran overseas, collaboration, networking, kawan, dan macam macam lagi!
to me, yang paliiiiiiiiig mahal sekali, rezeki ilmu tu dan jugak wisdom/advise dari Dr Q.
apa yang Dr Q ajar, nasihat & share banyak sangat mengubah perspektif and personaliti seketul Ain. Kebajikan terjaga jugak la dan banyak sangat membantu my own journey to become a mature person eventhough, still buat perangai budak mentah depan Dr Q (rasa macam nak jentik dahi pun ada), tapi saya insan yang masih belajar dan humble down to the Earth dengan ilmu yang tak seberapa. 

that's why I love research. ihiikkkkK! =)

4. geran overseas apa yang ko cakap nih?
well, I awarded a grant. Pada hikmah saya, saya tak terfikir pun student masters noob macam saya nak apply geran sendiri pastu DAPAT! (nak tips tak?? ihiiik!!). Hanya Allah yang tahu sebab saya pun coaching and hentam sendiri jer. Thing is, I am the one yang rasa segan for the award, so nak ikutkan, AKU STUDENT NOOB JERRRR! ehehehehhehehehe =p

tapi tu lah, yang banyak ajar Dr Q, Dr Sarizam, Dr Najmi. so thanks and credit to them la kan =)
in the mean time, I'm doing the best I can to prepare for lab work le bebeh.
project pasal apa? nanti I cerita lain ok sebabnya ada dua project lebih kurang jer cuma lain theories =)

rasanya tu jer kot. 
tak tau dah apa lagi yang nak di"life updates".
nampak macam tak clear sangat explanation =p

papepun, thank you for the following me all this time, and sudi baca XOXOXO arigatou

When I am about to share some recent posts on my life updates, etc... either on Facebook feeds, Instagram or X (formerly Twitter), I realize to keep those posts being viewed by public is unbearable. So I changed the view setting into custom, sorting them available to only close friends. The funniest part was that the determination would only last for 20 minutes before I decided to delete them forever. I swear it happened just now when I intended to press the delete button, thinking some petty posts I made would offend some friends with no intention. Really? What in your mind between posting and deleting?? Today, I am able to confirm, the reason I am being silent on social media; the fear of judgement sometimes shocked me into certain level. Oh the idea of getting busy with academic involvement was another episode of life drama.  

1. Citing Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben in Spiderman to someone I used to know who bears great power and influence beyond others in our organization, reminds me of great responsibility he must endure through time.

2. In the old days I played jokes on one of my best companion that I wished to marry a royalty. Yes, every girl dream of marrying princes charming and becoming princesses. Thanks to fairytales like Cinderella — ‘And they lived happily ever after.’

3. Marrying a prince would make you his princess. At least, that was been told in our childhood from generations to remind the girls that the handsome and charming prince always belong to the girl who behaves with the utmost courtesy towards everyone she meets.

4. However in this modern era, an actual real-life prince is difficult to find. Considering you have mutual friends with royalty or sharing connection among them then, it can be reconsidered to find one just like Kate and Prince William.

5. Prince or no prince maybe some of us might just happen to bump into men that hold powerful positions in political, economic and even social power. And maybe some of us might just happen to bump into average men yet still they play huge role in society, workplace as well as household because man is likely to associate with power compared to woman.

6. Realising every successful man there stands a strong woman. A man with great power comes great responsibility as well as YOU, WOMAN. There's a mother's hard work, a wife's support perhaps a sister well wishes for our beloved men.

SALAM SAYANG

Halu elibedi, long time no see, sorry for the long hiatus mode. I got messed up in the 5th semester regarding our never-ending mini project(s) and that when the 1st half semester of the 3rd year is about to end, I couldn't be more grateful with the blessings of good the lab soulmates. For sure, they are the perfect balance of responsible and laid back.

The tight schedule and the out numbered mini project is doesn't matter when it comes to you guys. Speaking of mini project, who knows that we got 4 of 'em no no no I mean 5 including hygiene which I thought gonna be kacang hijau but it simply not. Oh why I always thought that hygiene gonna be easy peasy, though I'm not even good in memorizing facts. hukhuk


Semester 5 is such an intense, exhilarating and terrifying experience .... Why I said so?? Jeng jeng jeng

1. Lots of mini project regarding on how to cultivate culture. When I mean "cultivate" it really means cultivating the microbes. You know that even you got 11 brains in the group but only 7 to 8 of  'em really worked well and could figure out things to do next. Somehow, I felt that I'm not even helping as much as I could, hehehe even my brain is also malfunctioned as well, Hiks.

Also, I learnt that this one guy, my partner lab, Rafique or Rafi Que you see, I speak with most of his name ends with a Q like pronunciation. It was Nawwal who started to tease by calling him Rafi Que, the solid 'Q' at the end by his name, then you gotta see he's blushing out of sudden sebab kena usik dengan budak perempuan hahaha.

Oh speaking of Mr. Rafi Que, for me he's a mad genius! He usually prefers silence to saying the something which isn't being asked in the first place except when Sarah, she's the one who led the mini project would urge him to contribute his valuable piece of mind to solve troubles regarding our mini project which gave us continuous headache sometimes.

2. This girl, Zana who is two years older than me got her own way to make me chilled some of the time when the experiment went intense pain. But, Zana really took it chill in her own style. She's such a chilled-type of lab partner but I think selamber suits her well because she's down for anything. Tak takut, tak gentar, tak kusut walaupun ribut datang membadai. Kahkahkah ayat macam tak boleh nak hiperbola lagikan bunyik. 


Thing to say is that I really enjoyed every second of her accompany during our working on mini project. Things get confused sometimes, but when with her, "You don't know the next step?? Just wing it." Hahahaha sounds the way too chill Zana but never mind, it worth my babygurl!

3. Thanks to Sarah. For awhile now we have been putting into the same group since our Biochemistry in the 2nd year. Being Sarah, she's considered a beauty with brain. Not that hottie gurlzz who likes to wear make up on the face every single time they got to go to classes. Sarah is just like a Melayu tulen, for sure, she's ayu, got her own beauty ala-ala gadis Terengganurians who speak with most of 'g' like pronunciation dekat belakang but indeed garang. Heck ... even the best joke I ever tried to slip in about Terengganurians speaking, "kalau pinggang korang pronounce macam mana ek?? Dia bluetickkan aku weh.. hmmm sedih T_T

4. Anger issues. Oh this one doesn't relate with Rafi Que, Sarah, Zana, Nawwal, etc rather lab partners from bioproduct. The work still has to get done but miscommunication occurred over the simplest task like, who want to pick up our dried c. odorata leaves from oven at 8 am??

All in all, it worth all the effort. We won 2nd place for both mini project and dapat bawak balik dua hamper besaq banyak cekedis for a week lagi-lagi sekarang musim hujan kat Kelantan ni. Nom nom nom

Haven't written much, lately. Despite having extremely hectic magical days ongoing mini project with the colleagues, turned out we had a tight schedule to get this mini project done. I boleh estimate dalam 2-3 hari minggu yang lepas, I cuma ulang-alik lab tingkat 3, just to record the microbes profile growth. Bak kata Anggun dalam instastory beliau, our routine fixed with visiting anak-anak kat taska. Here, we need to grow our own culture strain for a week-long mini project as if they were our anak3, much made us kelam-kabut for the first six weeks of the 5th semester. All said, I'm too occupied by them that I couldn't spare the time with my precious Tangled Thoughts.

Only, yes, again, to do some reports regarding the lab work. sobs

Last weekend was a hectic one. Spent my last four-day weekend by sitting on meja belajar, doing on the individual discussion in the middle of the night. But, my brain can't work best without playing a background music of Only Human by Jonas Brothers. It was just like my body response to the music and felt the rythm in my head. Then, I found myself foot tapping at the same time nodding the head. And might sometimes accompany with dancing while singing along to it. Singing, a karaoke, so called karok by dak3 hipster nowadays rather than paying 100% fully attention to get my reports done.

Today's lecture sangat menusuk kalbu. I can tell that all my coursemate would feel the same as I did, but the Guy-With-A-Gummy-Smile, THIS GUY OMG! turned out to be seorang yang mudah terhibur pada hari kejadian barangkali since I heard him gelak terbahak-bahak during the enzyme class when it comes to enzyme teaching by Dr. Aini. Those enzyme jokes never get old, is it.

Today's lecture seems to be out of topic. Instead we were being taught on lignocellulosic enzyme, the lecturer brought us to think outside of the box for a while regarding the bioconversion of lignocellulosic biomass —from waste to wealth. If people asked me is there something to do between the lignocellulosic enzyme and the biomass, I would simply take a few minutes to think. Think ain think!

My random, general answer got to be lignocellulosic enzyme is a degrading enzyme used in plant dry matter, so called lignocellulosic biomass. As you can see, the word enzyme itself represents an important role in breaking down complex molecules into its monomer, so called the simpler molecule. Meanwhile the word lignin and cellulose referred to a complex organic polymer deposited in plants cell wall to which they supply the strength and rigidity of plant walls.

Yeah, bla bla bla bio stuff -,- so what?

Ok continue. The major plant cell walls however consist of three main lignocellulosic components —lignin, cellulose and hemicellulose. These compositions are differed for different types of biomass.  The dense layers of cellulose and hemicellulose are packed by layers of lignin hence, pretreatment is necessary to breaking down the lignin layers in order to expose both cellulose and hemicellulose. So, pretreatment is the first and most important step in lignocellulosic biomass processing. Why so?? Sebab lignocellulosic biomass is considered unfermentable as most of the microbes incapable to degrade it without pretreatment.

(Saya pun bermonolog sejenak, thinking so pretreatment yang macam mana that has to be taken to break down the lignin layers?)

At some point, that was probably one of the reasons why I insisted to go to the today's lecture, listening to enzyme stuffs. LOL

Ya allah, the last time I've so done listening to this part when my bed was calling my name and I insisted to get myself out from, yep my beautiful soft warm bed. You see, the problem was I couldnt get out of bed since the blankets have accepted me as one of their own belongings. Tapi disebabkan saya waras sikit masa tu, saya tetap paksa diri untuk datang lecture.

"Enzymatic hydrolysis has to be efficient, rapid and complete to preatreat the biomass..."

"Enzymes are added to hydrolyze the pretreated lignocellulosic biomass into fermentable sugars including glucose and/or oligomers that can be further converted into valuable products through biological and chemical approaches."

"Ibarat sampah yang dibuang, di kemudian hari boleh menjadi sesuatu yang berguna"

"Same goes to some of you that being a late bloomer in their age group. Cumanya, saya tak cakaplah awak3 ni sampah, kata Dr. Aini kepada anak3 didiknya."

And the whole class laughed towards the statement.

By time the Guy-With-A-Gummy-Smile laughed so hard, something had pierced my heart to such a deep, emotionally statement.

The point is, however, the late bloomers begin to do well in college or at work, they will go from a barely noticed individual to a star. They do not suddenly become smart or talented. And maybe I'm pretty sure that it can be triggered by some other events that happen in a specific period of time. Of course, the transformation from being barely noticed individual to a star isn't due to overnight magic.

Metaphorically, they get to use escalators while you’re taking flight of stairs to your life journey. When you’ve finally reach your final step, it’s supposed to be an accomplishment, right? 

Out of sudden, you know that when the reality hits you out of nowhere. It's just getting hard to pay 100% fully attention without my mind wandering to some other places. Ok berangan lagi dalam kelas.