Rambled on #1 :Act cool

I may think i'm cooler than i actually am. The fact that I have to act cool in order to hide my own insecurities.

This happened when i was at school. It was a school contest to win a grand prize. At first, i refused to take part bcs i realised i need to put a lot of effort into the contest to win the prize. That's what supposed the contest is all about, is it? 

it seemed that i cant be so determined with my decision. i took part because farisya was keen to ask me for joining her. she said, "kita masuk sama-sama, at least aku ada kawan" 

so, that's what friends are for, is it? 

knowing that the main reason i took part the contest for farisya's sake and at the same time i must win the contest. dipendekkan cerita, i spent a whole night, struggle, and put a great amount of effort just to win the contest. The day of the submission, i was overconfident that i'll get a first place.

dipendekkan cerita lagi, the contest winners announced after a week. guess what? farisya won 2nd place and i got nothing even untuk saguhati sekalipun. ughhh. Mula rasa dunia tak adil dengan insan yang lemah ini. i thought that i was cool for being a loser tapi sangkaan ku meleset, the insecurity hits me and i couldnt bear the sadness of being a loser. aaaaaaaaa. Shh, act cool ain, act cool like you always do